As we head into that reflection space between the years, one of the most beneficial exercises is to banish the tolerations in your personal and professional life!
Tolerations are those things that you put up with every day that distract you from other things. Sometimes the underlying source of continued tolerations is to avoid taking full responsibility for particular circumstances in your life, but eventually you will recognize that this is in large part what may be holding you back from achieving your goals. In handling the things you are tolerating, you free up time and energy to devote to a higher quality of life.
Examples of tolerations:
- Living in an apartment I don’t like, in a neighborhood or city I don’t like
- Peeling wallpaper, a guest bedroom that has become a storage unit, excessive clutter, house walls that need painting
- Negative attitudes of people whom I work
- My lack of creative output
- Spending 8 hours a day in a room with no windows
- Throwing away money on things I don’t really need
- Too much television, not enough time for anything else
- The no-leadership style from my boss
- Walking by the broken jewelry box knowing it is mine to fix
- Seeing the scuffed stairs every day and knowing it is something I can fix
- Knowing you have outgrown the job, the company, the town, the relationship
Humans tolerate a lot. Often, we’re taught not to complain, to accept that life is difficult, not to rock the boat, to go along with others, to be grateful for what we have, to be understanding. Not bad advice, but we can still stop tolerating what we know should change.
When people have stopped tolerating:
- They are happier
- They have extra energy and know the high of accomplishment
- They have the edge: they step over nothing
When they continue tolerate?
- The work becomes mediocre; they are tired
- Natural creativity is squashed
- They become less effective
How to Zap Tolerations:
- Understand that putting up with the things is good for no one
- Make a list of 5 things you are tolerating at home (write them out, track your progress)
- Make the requests or take the actions to eliminate these items
- Make a list of 5 things you are tolerating at work/school (write them out, track your progress)
- Take the actions of eliminate these things
- Notice the increase of positive energy and the decrease of negative energy
- Notice that you stop complaining, you make strong requests or take the action
Look for Pivotal Tolerations: something you are putting with that, when handled, will resolve other tolerations.
Start today – be the person of action. Set up your project plan and know how you will move forward with starting, stopping, or changing those things you have been tolerating.
I am heading home to fix my stairs, I can going to clean them and determine if paint is required. I will give myself a Friday deadline to complete the project. I will know that self satisfaction every time I take those stairs I took the action that was mine to take. It will be the right investment.
If you are considering major change in your life, specifically your career, I encourage you to find a Coach. This is someone can help you create your plan and encourage the execution as you move to that person you want to be.
Dyan Connolly, Career Coach